Pink Blossom

The Recovering Good Girl

Freedom from Pleasing, Perfection, and Pretending
Does it ever feel like your inner good girl is running your life? 

She probably learned very young to follow the rules in order to keep the peace or feel like she mattered. 

If this feels familiar... 

You’re likely ruled by the 3 P’s: 

Pleasing, Perfectionism and Pretending

This is the epidemic of the ‘Good Girl’.

I’ve been there. Once I realized I was playing the part of the ‘Good Girl’, I also had to acknowledge how much pain, dissatisfaction, and unfulfillment it was causing me to try to be everything for everyone all the time. 

This is no way to live. 

You deserve to rest.

You deserve to find strength in your softness.

You deserve to feel good-enough for just being you.

You deserve to take a break from the constant self-improvement.

How?

Together we go on a journey of self-acceptance by:

Replacing the relentless voice in your head pushing you to be better.

Remothering your inner child to feel loveable for just being you. 

Reclaiming your voice so you can finally say no without feeling guilty.

Remember trust and intuition with yourself and your body

Rediscovering who you are under the masks of perfection + pleasing

What if...

Just stick with me for a moment.

What if we’re not meant to be perfect, but instead

Feel good.
Experience pleasure.
 
Find a place to rest in simply being and
 
Having enough.
What’s the point of having it all, if we can’t enjoy it?

Why?

Good girls grow up to become nice women.
The world does not need any more nice women.
The world needs women who are willing to...
change the conversation, change the culture, change the world.

We all enrolled in a system whether we know it or not. As women the system is designed to keep us small and to keep us distracted. We are made to distrust our voices, distrust our power and distrust our intuition.

This is what our culture does to women.

And we as women have upheld this as our standard.

 

We have allowed ourselves to be distracted by the endless pursuit for perfection.

This constant chase for a dream that doesn’t exist, drains our energy, keeps us numb.

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Are you a 'Good Girl'?

How many of these apply?
You are a high-achiever who, from the outside, look like you have everything but inside there’s a feeling of unfulfillment despite working tirelessly all the time.
You relate to the burden of the 3 P’s: perfectionism, pleasing and pretending.
You feel like once you have that thing, then, you’ll be happy, but you find yourself always raising the bar and chasing the dream.
You always have an ongoing list of things to do, but your pleasure is never on there.
You are driven by being liked which means you swallow your voice, your truth, your intuition so you don’t make others uncomfortable.
You simultaneously feel too-much and not-enough at the same time.
You have a suppressed, unwanted resentment + anger that’s been sugar-coated in the need to be nice all the time because that’s what good girls do.
You’re praised for how much you give, how much you do, how much you put others first.
You find yourself relating to others through competition, comparison, and keeping score over real, deep, meaningful connection.
You pride yourself on being able to hold everything together (which really means holding everything in), when there’s really part of you that wants to just breakdown.
If you’ve checked five or more of these, you’re a 'Good Girl'.

How to become a Recovering Good Girl?

Stop being so hard on yourself and learn how to soften into the truth of who you are.
Stop investing your time, money and energy into how you, your family, and house look and learn how to invest your inner + outer resources in how you feel.
 
Stop saying YES to everything but yourself and create space and boundaries that center your peace, pleasure + happiness.
Stop suppressing anxiety, sadness, anger, resentment and learn how to feel and process your emotions.
Stop retreating when you are in pain and learn how to to ask for help and receive support without feeling guilty or less than.
Stop the overthinking and over analysis that happens in your mind and learn how to trust your body +  your intuition.
Stop trying to make everyone happy and develop the courage and confidence to be with the discomfort that comes with disappointing another to be true to yourself.
Stop waiting for things to magically change and discover the magic buried inside your inner 'good girl'.

That’s why I’ve created the

Recovering Good Girl

A 6-month mentorship
Because if you’ve been a good girl all your life, you need support, you need to know, it takes time,
And I’m here to be your guide.
 
Because I’ve been there…

I was born a free-spirit into an alcoholic home where life was very hard and I learned to survive by becoming the “good girl”. As a little girl I promised myself I would create the life I always dreamed of and I did. The more I had though, the less happy I became. I had a Master’s degree, a promising career, I found my soul-mate, we had two miracle babies, bought the big house with a pool and everything looked good on the outside. Inside I was terribly anxious, lonely and angry. One day I burst these words out in couple’s counseling and there was no going back:  “I feel like I’m living a lie”. Everything changed after that. I realized that I was hiding inside my picture perfect life and I had gotten lost along the way. I made a commitment to heal and mother myself with as much love and care as I mothered my children.

 

This is how I became a Recovering Good Girl.

“Shaelyn is an incredible mentor who helped me to embrace my vulnerability as a strength.  Before working with Shaelyn I cared too much what others thought of me to freely express myself. Now I have the tools, confidence and feel so much MORE comfortable in my own skin. I am eternally grateful I decided to face my fears of vulnerability and hire Shaelyn as my coach.”

Ali Hornung

What’s the point of having it all, if we can’t enjoy it?
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